When Life Gives You Lemons...Give One To Your Baby

Have you seen this series of photos? How funny is it?! I mean, perhaps it's a little mean to laugh at your baby's pucker face but not mean enough to stop me from doing it. There was a lemon tree in our yard in Florida so I had to put Ruby to the test. Here's a series of her reacting.

It started off ok...

Then there was some uncertainty...

And then reality set in...

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Baby Swimming Lessons

Well it's been a few lessons since her first one, but I had to share this. A pool full of chubby little babies learning to swim - what could be cuter? (even though people still think Ruby is a boy, despite the skirt attached to her bathing suit bottoms...).

Here are some pictures from her first day:

{assessing the new situation} 

{deciding she loves the taste of pool water} 

These lessons are very much a daddy-daughter thing, but I had to take her last weekend (Nick was working). Due to the fact that I was feeling self-conscious in a bathing suit, I tried to stay as submerged in the water as possible. Since the pool is super shallow and I'm quite tall, that meant I was basically doing a perma-squat the entire time, with Ruby as my weight. My legs were actually sore the next day. What a way to trick myself in to working out #theonlywayiteverhappens ...

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A Day in the Life

I haven't done a Day in the Life post for a little while (since August). Now that Ruby is at a very different stage of babyhood, I thought I'd do another.

Number of times I tried to ignore the noise from the baby monitor in the morning: 2 (which means that it actually worked once)
Time I dragged myself out of bed: 7:12am - which doesn't sound so bad until you know I was up three times during the night.
Cups of coffee: 2 3
Number of times I lifted Ruby up to sniff her butt (a practice that I formerly found disgusting): 3
Attempts it took to get little miss down for her morning nap: 2 (not the worst); and afternoon nap: 1 (hooray!)
Toys surrounding me currently: 8
Of those toys, the number that make obnoxious sounds: 2
The average noise level coming from Ruby: 8 (mainly shrieking, mixed with some adorable cooing)
The words used most today: "Rocky, NO". I'm quite certain they will be Ruby's first words as well.
Pages of my book read: 0

The Day's Accomplishments: Made the bed, skyped with my mother-in-law, fixed drafty door (by stuffing a towel between the screen and the glass...hey, I didn't say it was pretty), made and ate lunch using one arm/hand (the other one was holding the baby who would instantly bawl if I put her down), wrote a few blog posts, got Ruby to try oatmeal (wasn't well received). Sometimes you just have to celebrate the small wins.

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Things No One Told Me (Or Maybe They Did But I Didn't Believe Them)

In preparation for having Ruby, I did very little reading, but I did hear lots of different information from the women in my life. Although I was happy to get some insight, I don't think I took all of it to heart. Here are a few things that either I had never heard or didn't fully buy into. Let's just say, I was wrong.

1. You will definitely want an epidural. I wasn't convinced, nor should you be since everyone handles pain differently, but I was begging for it, just saying...

2. The Baby Blues. I hadn't even heard of that until I got home with Ruby. I probably would have benefited from a little bit of reading on that one (since I cried every evening for two weeks).

3. Baby Brain. As much as I don't like this one, I still find myself struggling to look for the word I'm trying to use on a daily basis. What IS this?

4. Unsolicited advice from strangers. Maybe I did believe this one, but it annoys me more than I ever thought it would. There's no need to point out that my baby isn't wearing socks. I am aware and I have been outside with her for less than a minute. Now move along.

5. You will become a nervous driver/traveller. Totally didn't buy it, but the flying fear seriously kicked in and when I drive now I feel like everyone is drifting into my lane (not likely).

6. The 'you sleep when the baby sleeps' deal - I figured, ya no problem. I love naps I will be able to do that no problem. Not so much. When Ruby was napping, I wanted to make something to eat, or take a shower, or tidy up a bit (I know people say cleaning can wait but sometimes it's nice to feel like you don't live in a dump), or even just be awake and do something for myself. Even still I only manage a 15 minute cat nap per day.

7. The number of random songs you will make up. I am basically narrating our entire day as some on-going ridiculous song. Some of my better (and repeat) titles include: The Pants Dance, Let's Change Your Diap- y, Lotion Lotion Lotion and Pants Aren't Food.

8. You will hover over your sleeping child, staring at them in awe, but if they so much as move a pinky finger, you army crawl out of there immediately because you can't deal with it if they wake up.

9. You will do insane things to make your kid smile. Strange faces, making sounds that only animals would make, and star jumps...all in a day's work.

{case in point: me doing a lot of silly smiles to solicit a somewhat aloof half smile}

These are some things I've come across in the first six months of Ruby's life (I can't believe she's six months old already!). I'm sure I will have a follow up post to this one in the coming months.

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Phantom Kicks and a Mean Joke

A friend of mine, who also recently had a baby, told me that she had heard from other moms about feeling baby kicks after the baby was born. I don't know if the official term is phantom kicks but it sounds a lot like people feeling pain in a phantom limb so let's just go with that.

Recently, I started feeling those phantom kicks. It's really quite creepy. After a week or two of feeling them, I started to get concerned that maybe they weren't phantom after all. Could I be pregnant again? Oh please no. No no. Not now. The only way to be certain was to take a pregnancy test.

So I took the test, waited in the bathroom for the result, and then I had a funny idea. I would call Nick in and pretend to be all upset. In my best scared/worried/uncertain voice, I quietly called him. Then, with a little more urgency. I made my voice waiver as if I was about to cry. I said, "can you please come in here?". I heard him get up, start towards the bathroom, asking if everything was ok (I could hear the concern in his voice). That's when I jumped out of the bathroom and yelled 'It's NEGATIVE!' and burst out laughing. Apparently that was quite a mean joke. I really had him going and he was starting to panic. Whoops! But I mean, it's not that often that you have an opportunity for that kind of prank right? (well I don't, at least), so I took advantage. Sorry love ;)

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My Mothering Instincts Failed!

Mornings with Ruby are usually my favourite. This morning was no exception. I opened the door to her room, peaked over her crib and said good morning. I was greeted with a big smile. I turned the lights on ever so slightly and walked over to the other side of her crib. I was just about to let Rocky out so I kissed her good morning and then reached for her stuffed cow to keep her company until I was back. That's when it happened.

When I picked up the cow, a centipede ran out from under it and went straight to Ruby. My reaction? I chucked the cow and ran for it.

OH MY GOD I ABANDONED MY BABY.

I thought I was getting all 'tough mama' because I'm better at killing spiders now, but evidently centipedes are a different story. At this point, after I realized it was probably hiding under my baby, I knew I had to help her out. So I went over and rolled her over super fast to catch that bug. Baby rolled: no bug. Bigger fear sets in - the centipede is inside her sleep sack. I unzip the sleep sack like I am trying to surprise a burglar inside and take her out of it with extreme speed. No bug. Even more panic. This thing must have crawled in her jammies. I am now handling my baby like she is radioactive. I unsnap her pajamas, overcome with fear that I have to battle the centipede. I rip them off, shake them, and chuck them in the laundry. My diapered baby just looking up at me. No centipede, cold baby. Crazy mother.

I have no idea where it went and now I'm afraid to put her back in the crib. Worst. Mom. Ever.

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Early Morning

{tasting sweet potato}

Well I've been up since 5 (that's when little Miss Tuesday decided she was hungry) and while she has been able to fall back to sleep, I haven't. I tried for a bit but then decided I might as well just get up. It's really quite nice to have some quiet time in the morning before Ruby is ready to start the day.

She's so busy now that I don't get the same amount of down time as I did in those first couple months. She expects a certain standard of entertainment, including a variety of activities in a variety of locations. I spend a significant portion of my day doing anything and everything to make her laugh and let me tell you, she's not the easiest audience.

Ruby is 20 weeks old today, but I know counting things in weeks annoys a lot of people, pre-baby Emma included, so we'll round it to 4.5 months. While she's so much busier and demanding so much more time and attention (aka sleeping less during the day) now, she's so much cooler and more fun to hang out with. She watches and listens while I narrate every activity in our day.

So many people have asked me "Don't you looooove being a mom?" and it got me thinking. For me, I wouldn't say that loving being a mom is necessarily synonymous with loving my child. What I loooove (absolutely, without a doubt) is Ruby. My journey in to motherhood has given me a lot to think about and evaluate. It's the hardest thing I've done to date and I am learning as I go. Some of the stuff that comes along with motherhood is amazing (like seeing Ruby every morning as she looks up at me from her crib and her little face breaks into a huge smile) and some of it is sucky (like getting punched in the eye by your baby's flailing hands and crying because it legitimately hurt) but I am obsessed and in love with my baby. That's one thing I say with 100% certainty.

What do you think? Are motherhood and baby-loving one in the same or can they exist as two separate ideas? What about fatherhood?

Ps. It's 7am and still dark out. What's up with that?

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I'm a Mom, but it doesn't end there

I am now a mother. This is something I have thought about for a long time and was absolutely ready for. I am sure that being a mom to Ruby will be one of the most amazing and challenging roles I will have in my life. But, and yes, there's a but, I'm not just a mom.

A little while ago, I went out to some events for moms/babies. I was looking to get out of the house, find some activities for Ruby and myself, you get the idea. One thing I was disturbed by was that the identity of the moms as these events was virtually non-existent. Almost no one introduced themselves, and in the more structured events, only the names of the babies mattered. In hindsight, I realize that I was going to a moms group and first thing we would all have in common was our babies, but I guess I expected to learn some more about the other mothers. Not so much.

I found it so disheartening that one day Nick came home and found me almost in tears. All of a sudden it felt like my former identity was stripped from me. The next day I came to my senses and realized that I am in control of who I am. Not only am I a mom, but I am a wife, daughter, sister, friend. An advice-giver, an HR Manager, a blogger. I have interests in things other than parenting and I believe that not only will that make me a better mom to Ruby, but it will make me a better role model to her as well.

Every mom had an identity before her children were born, and I don't think having a baby means you have to put that aside. Too many times I hear "well, I'm a mom now" like that somehow erases who you used to be. There are some clear lifestyle changes that moms tend to make, for example, no longer can I drink a bottle of wine and sleep the entire next day away). However, I will still make sure I get nights with my girlfriends and I will at least have a glass! Just as people don't define themselves only by their career choice, nor should mothers define themselves by motherhood alone.

My purpose for writing this isn't to criticize any mother and the choices she's made, it is simply to point out that there's no reason to lose yourself in motherhood.

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Nighttime Thoughts

Lately I've been finding it much more difficult to fall back asleep after getting up with little Miss Tuesday during the night. What does that result in? Thoughts. Thoughts after thoughts after thoughts. And here's the other night:

4:45am
Ok, back to sleep.
It's almost 5am. What time is Nick getting up?
Must fall asleep before his alarm.
Don't look at the baby monitor, she's fine.
Deep soothing breath. Sleeeeep.
Don't think of anything scary. *Immediately think of the scary face at the end of the Annabelle (new scary movie) preview.* Yikes!
It's probably all that sugar I had before bed that is making this worse. Those squares were yummy.
I wonder what was in them...was there margarine in the base?
Do any of my friends still eat margarine?
I should talk to them about that.
Ok try again. Free your mind of thoughts.
Free your mind. Wasn't that an En Vogue song?
How you pronounce it? En Vogue or On Vogue?
Clearly On Vogue would be the right pronunciation, although it sounds a bit pretentious.
Resist the urge to look at that baby monitor. *looks at it anyway*
Baby is asleep.
Sleep.

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Flying with a Baby

I obviously can't pretend to be an expert on travelling with a baby when I've only ever flown with her twice, but I thought I'd share the things I learned and found helpful. I have to say, we were lucky that Ruby slept for the entire time on our way to England and at least for half of the flight on our way home.

{happy parents, sleeping baby}

Some of this advice depends on which airline you're flying with. As we were briefed on flying with an infant, the flight attended told us that during takeoff and landing, the baby had to be upright in the burping position (facing backwards, over a shoulder). Well, there went my plans to nurse her on takeoff/landing. On our flight to the UK, I nodded but since she didn't come back, I still nursed her on take off. On our returning flight, I listened and nursed her until we were taxiing, then moved her into position for take-off and she was A-OK. Just be ready to nurse the baby or give them a soother once you're in the air in case their ears did pop.

Since there was a chance I couldn't nurse her upon landing (let me tell ya, it's difficult to time that out when your baby wakes up hungry and it isn't quite time to descend), we brought out the soother. Ruby is funny with soothers and sometimes she wants nothing to do with it. But, ya know what? Even if she's playing with it in her mouth, it still makes her swallow and it helped her little ears from popping. So even if your baby won't take the soother, bring one and just hold it in while they move it around. It works :)

{unimpressed with the soother, but hey, no ears popping!}

Make sure to have diapers and wipes within reach so you don't have to do too much juggling when the baby needs a change. Again, depending on your airline and plane, some (like the one we were in) have one larger washroom that makes things a lot easier for changing a baby. Also, get your spouse to do it (I'm too nervous about hitting turbulence with the baby while in the washroom, so Nick did all the diaper changes - lucky me).

Last tip (advice from my lovely cousin) is to bring your breastfeeding pillow. Yes, you have to drag it around the airport, but once you're seated, the baby is comfy and it leaves your hands free so that you can eat, read a book, etc. I can't imagine having to just hold the baby in my arms for a 7 hour flight! The pillow was definitely worth it and even the flight attendants were impressed.

Hopefully some of these tips are helpful for anyone ready to travel with an infant. The anticipation of the flight was much worse than actually living it :)

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Ruby's First Trip to England

{four generations} 

We are back from England! Actually, we've been home for a few days but the jet lag was a killer so I couldn't bring myself to do much until now.

We had such a lovely time introducing Ruby to her aunties, uncles, cousins and especially to her great grandmother. Her granny and grandpa were also very excited to see her again. Every morning we would wake up, stumble downstairs, I would drink I giant French Press of coffee (all to myself) while Ruby was enveloped in cuddles.

We had lots of time to catch up, as well as do some sight-seeing and tourist activities. We had family dinners, trips to the pub, sing-alongs, walks around town, a trip to Liverpool to see my cousins, a trip into Chester for shopping, we visited a beautiful garden that had a monkey forest, took a trip to the beach in Wales, and we even got a night out with friends while granny and grandpa looked after Ruby.

Here are some pictures of the trip...

Off to England

We are taking Ruby on her first international trip. We're heading to England so she can meet the rest of her family and friends. To say I'm anxious about travelling with her is the understatement of the year. Not only have a developed a brand new extreme fear of flying, I'm also nervous that she will scream through the entire night flight and we will be the most hated people on the plane.

Realistically, she's pretty good at night, so I'm hoping that she will just snuggle up and snooze (that way Nick and I can get some shut-eye as well). Jet lag will be a whole other story...

When we get back, if all goes well, I'll share some of our tips for travelling with a baby. Until then, I'm relying on the tips from some of my favourite bloggers:

A Cup of Jo
Aspiring Kennedy

I love their tips. These ladies have babies/kids that are seasoned travelers. Let's hope that before long Ruby can join those ranks!

Anybody out there have any last minute tips for me?

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New Mom Stuff

I have such a distinct recollection of an episode of Sex and the City when Miranda first had Brady and is out for brunch with the girls, talking about the woes of being a new mom. She talks about how she doesn't have time to wash her hair and that all her clothes smell like barf. Yep.

In fact, I almost don't notice when she barfs all over me anymore. Often someone will awkwardly point it out, and if I don't have a cloth, I'll just wipe it up with my clothes. Yep. That's my life right now.

Thank goodness I still have the good sense to wear makeup. I haven't totally lost it.

image via 

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A day in the life

Now that I've settled into my mat leave, my days are starting to resemble a Bridget Jones novel. At some point each day I stop and take stock of my daily activities and accomplishments.

Here's what yesterday looked like:
Cups of coffee 3 (but giant mugs so more like 5)
Daytime talk shows 3
Diapers changed 100 (in reality probably 6)
Baby bathed 1
Showered, blow-dried hair and applied make up (!)
Dishwashers emptied 1
Tidied kitchen so as to keep up the good housewife vibe
Ate reasonably healthy
Garbages emptied 2
Spiders  killed to save infant daughter from being bitten 2 (felt like a hero-mom afterwards since I'm terrified of spiders)
Dog barf found 3, leading to sheets washed
Skypes to the UK 2

At the end of the day it seems all I managed to do was shower, get dressed, get Ruby dressed and fed, eat,  do a couple things around the house and have a chat with my in-laws. By the time Nick gets home and asks how the day was, I'm usually at a loss for what actually happened. Must.Make.More.Plans.

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